Monday, December 24, 2007

Twisted Sense of Humor

The Twisted Sister Christmas album. My wife has a twisted sense of humor. There was the added entertainment factor of trying to guess what Christmas song was up before the singing/screaming commenced.

UPDATE: My favorite on the album:

On my heavy metal Christmas my true love gave to me,
12 silver crosses
11 black mascaras
10 pairs of platforms
9 tattered t-shirts
8 pentagrams
7 leather jackets
6 cans of hairspray
5 skull earrings
4 quarts of Jack
3 studded belts
2 pairs of spandex pants
and a tattoo of Ozzy!

Saturday, December 22, 2007

A Christmas Meme

Tagged with a Christmas Meme

We've been tagged with a Christmas meme by The Feline Theocracy.

The rules: Link to the person that tagged you, and post the rules on your blog. Share Christmas facts about yourself. Tag random people at the end of your post, and include links to their blogs. Let each person know that they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

1. Wrapping or gift bags? Both. I prefer to wrap, but after the first half dozen packages, I find myself reaching for bags.

2. Real or artificial tree? I used to always get a real tree, but last year I couldn't find one small enough for the place we planned to put it, so I sprung for an artificial one. It looks pretty good - not like the ones my grandparents had, but I do miss the smell of a real pine tree.

3. When do you put up the tree? Mid-December. I never get around to it before that.

4. When do you take the tree down? Sometime in January. Again usually the middle of the month. We usually need the space for something else.

5. Do you like eggnog? Yes, but only because of the rum in it. It seems too rich to me now. And the wife doesn't like it, so I don't bother getting it anymore.

6. Favorite gift received as a child? Most of my early childhood gifts blur together. But I remember two. When I was about 4, I got a metal hook and ladder Tonka fire truck. I still remember it. I also got my first bike a few years later. Had it until my early teens.

7. Do you have a nativity scene? We have one, but I couldn't remember where it was packed away, so it didn't go up. Its missing about half the figures, so we actually need to get a new one.

8. Worst Christmas gift you ever received? I can't think of one.

9. Mail or e-mail Christmas cards? We mailed Christmas cards this year, but only at the last minute. Its not clear that they will reach their destination in time. Typically the last few years I'd send out an email letter. But I wanted to do a bit more this year.

10. Favorite Christmas movie? A Christmas Story. I missed this when it first came out. Caught it in a theatre a few years ago and couldn't stop laughing.

11. When do you start shopping for Christmas? Early to mid-November. I usually start looking for sales online.

12. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? Prime rib with Yorkshire pudding. Although this year it will be lamb instead.

13. Clear lights or colored on the tree? A mixture of both. This year it turned out by accident to be red, white, and blue. I'm going to look for strings of warmer colors to add for next year.

14. Favorite Christmas song? Carol of the Old Ones.

Now it's time to tag someone. Let's see how about ... Dr. Zaius, Evil Spock, and mem beth.

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

White House Fire

A fire erupted this morning in the White House compound in the Executive Office Building. The blaze appeared to be located near the ceremonial office of Vice President Dick Cheney on the second floor of the building. Rumors abound that the fire was caused by one of the VP's many shredders which operate 24/7.

UPDATE: It appears that the fire was not caused by the shredders since they are housed at Cheney's undisclosed location and not in the ceremonial office of Vice President.

The current theory is that since Cheney is the Devil its actually quite hard for him to sit in a modern office what with all that paper around and not cause a fire. He must have had a rip in his human suit.

Monday, December 17, 2007

At least they're not waterboarding the animals

Back in June I had a half serious post asking why do the Republicans hate our pets? My goal was to provoke while pointing out how each of the major Republican candidates had demonstrated questionable, and in one case criminal, judgment with regards to their treatment of animals.

I had thought that I could leave this distasteful story in the past, but a recent Newsweek story details allegations that the then 17 year old David Huckabee, son of presidential candidate Mike Huckabee, was involved in the torturing and hanging of a stray dog at a Boy Scout camp in 1998. David Huckabee was dismissed from his job as a counselor by the scouts, and there were calls for him to be investigated for violation of the state animal-cruelty laws. No charges were ever filed. The then director of the Arkansas state police, John Bailey, claims he was fired by Huckabee, because he refused to kill the investigation.

Conservative talking heads tried to diminish the importance of the story by focusing on Mike not being responsible for the actions of David. One when so far as to dismiss the torture itself by joking that David hadn't water boarded the animal.

This misses the point that David was a minor. Mike Huckabee had some responsibility for his son actions. Especially when that son that was demonstrating classic sociopathic behavior. One has to wonder what sort of parenting led to a son who can behave in this way.

Secondly, Huckabee's killing of an investigation into his son's behavior, if true, demonstrates a true subversion of justice. One that should lead to corruption charges.

One would think that the resolution of either of these charges would be critical when deciding something as important as the office of the president.

The trouble with Hillary

Thursday, December 13, 2007


A great send up of Wikipedia biographies. This could have been straight out of South Park, but they would have called it Douche-ipedia, Dickipedia is the wiki of dicks. While consisting of only a handful of articles, they range across the political spectrum and even include the Pilgrims.

The Pilgrims had originally fled a volatile political environment in the East Midlands of England for the Netherlands. But once in the Netherlands, the Pilgrims’ level of dickishness was such that they couldn’t live even in the Netherlands. Many have asked, what kind of dick would find the Netherlands too intolerant or too constraining? The answer is the Pilgrims.

Of the current presidential candidates both Hillary and Giuliani have their own pages.

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

What is it about Dogs and Squirrels

Walmart's attack on teenage girls

Walmart's message to little girls - Who needs credit cards when you've got ...

Thanks to Blue Gal for pointing this one out.

Joys of Winter

We'll we've finely gotten our snow. About 6" over the weekend and a few more inches over the night. Its still coming down as I type.

Over at Zaius Nation, the doctor has a post on the joys of snow and seasons. It seems he misses the boring mild weather of California.

Friday, December 07, 2007

A much better Presidental Chooser

Ultimate 2008 Presidential Candidate Matcher
Your Result: Barack Obama

Barack Obama is noted for his inspirational speeches and honesty about his positions. He is liberal on social issues, being pro-choice and supporting same-sex civil unions. Obama wants to reform healthcare, fund stem cell research, and renegotiate NAFTA. He supports a withdrawl of US troops from Iraq.

Dennis Kucinich
Hillary Clinton
John Edwards
Rudy Guiliani
Ron Paul
Mitt Romney
John McCain
Ultimate 2008 Presidential Candidate Matcher
Take More Quizzes

What American accent do you have?

What American accent do you have?
Your Result: The Midland

"You have a Midland accent" is just another way of saying "you don't have an accent." You probably are from the Midland (Pennsylvania, southern Ohio, southern Indiana, southern Illinois, and Missouri) but then for all we know you could be from Florida or Charleston or one of those big southern cities like Atlanta or Dallas. You have a good voice for TV and radio.

The West
North Central
The Inland North
The South
The Northeast
What American accent do you have?
Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Young Chimps beat College Students

Researchers that pitted young chimps against human college students in tests of short-term memory found that the young chimps scored better on the tests than the humans. This ability decreased as the chimps aged. The researchers speculate that the chimp's memory skills resembles a skill found in children, but which dissipates with age and that the development of language in humans supplanted this ability.

Of course a simpler theory is that its all due to alcohol consumption and sleep deprivation.